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- Daily Show: Indecision 2009 - Vote or Keep Going About Your Day


- Mike Bloomberg connects with the common man, Jon Corzine attacks Chris Christie's waistline, and Doug Hoffman passes Glenn Beck's test.
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- Daily Show: Is Our Dick Going Soft?


- Dick Cheney recognizes his handwritten notes on Joe Wilson's op-ed piece, but he can't recall why he wrote them.
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- Daily Show: Indecision 2009 - Local Election Results


- The losers of the New Jersey, Virginia and New York elections become winners thanks to some turd polishing.
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- Daily Show: Can't Get Queer From Here


- Maine voters want to be tolerant of gays, but unfortunately, they weren't born that way.
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- Daily Show: Intro - Congratulations to the Yankees


- The Yankees win their 27th World Series title -- they now have a few more than the Mets.
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- Daily Show: The 11/3 Project


- There's a war going on in America, and the stakes are nothing less than Glenn Beck's internal organs.
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- Daily Show: The Men Who Stare at Votes


- The House of Representatives finally passes health care reform after the exciting pre-game festivities.
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- Daily Show: Sean Hannity Uses Glenn Beck's Protest Footage


- Sean Hannity uses footage of Glenn Beck's bigger protest to make the GOP's health care rally appear more heavily attended.
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- Daily Show: Want Ads - Grateful Dead Archivist


- UC Santa Cruz looks for someone who loves the Grateful Dead yet somehow also has exceptional organizational skills.
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- Daily Show: Lou Dobbs Goes Rogue


- Lou Dobbs quits CNN because the suffocating network wouldn't let him be as honest and straightforward as he'd like to be.
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- Daily Show: Sean Hannity Apologizes to Jon


- Not even an apology from Sean Hannity is worth Jon having to watch his entire show.
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- Daily Show: Preggers Can't Be Choosers


- The House passes the health care reform bill thanks to an amendment barring federal funds from paying for abortions.
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- Daily Show: Windowless News Van for Kids - The Ball


- The ball finally gets inducted into the National Toy Hall of Fame after the stick and the cardboard box.
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- Daily Show: The Rogue Warrior


- While promoting her new book, Sarah Palin delivers her wisdom as a conservative boilerplate Mad Lib.
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- Daily Show: Things Not to Be Thankful For - Silverdome, Goldman Sachs & Congressional Recess


- Detroit sells its Silverdome for less than a one-bedroom apartment, Goldman Sachs reports huge profits, and three congressmen warn New Yorkers of terrorism.
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- Daily Show: Gaywatch - Peter Vadala & William Phillips


- Peter Vadala is fired for telling his boss that homosexuality is "bad stuff," and Mick Foley protects a 10-year-old who supports gay rights.
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- Daily Show: The Real Asswipes of Washington, D.C.


- Aasif Mandvi, Jason Jones and Edward R. Brokaw-Amanpour weigh in on a couple that crashed a state dinner at the White House.
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