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-
- High-Definition Upgrade
- Now that Stephen is in high definition, his opinions will be crisper and his anger more saturated.
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- High-Definition Upgrade
-
- Genitalia Bomb Threat
- Terrorists will be able to fool the TSA full-body scans by designing a bomb that looks like genitalia.
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- Add To My Lineup
- Genitalia Bomb Threat
-
- High-Definition Advertising
- High definition allows Stephen to sell ad space inside each of his now-visible facial pores.
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- Add To My Lineup
- High-Definition Advertising
-
- Night of Terror - The Crapification of the American Pant-Scape
- Airport crotch screening won't be inconvenient for frequent travelers who have a government-issued photo ID of their balls.
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- Night of Terror - The Crapification of the American Pant-Scape
-
- A Message to Standard-Definition Cable Providers
- Stephen has a special message for all the cable providers broadcasting him in standard definition.
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- A Message to Standard-Definition Cable Providers
-
- Drag Me to Health - Ezra Klein & Linda Douglass
- Ezra Klein believes the health care bill is pretty moderate, and Linda Douglass addresses Erick Erickson.
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- Drag Me to Health - Ezra Klein & Linda Douglass
-
- Failure to Connect the Dots
- Stephen shows how easy it is to connect the dots to the underwear bomber on his T.G.I. Jihad's placemat.
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- Failure to Connect the Dots
-
- Harry Reid's Racist Comment
- Thanks to Harry Reid's comment about Barack Obama, Stephen gets to chant the word "negro."
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- Harry Reid's Racist Comment
-
- Roxxxy the Sex Robot
- Inspired by 9/11, a man invents a sex robot that has touch sensors and the ability to download different personalities.
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- Add To My Lineup
- Roxxxy the Sex Robot
-
- We Are at War - Philip Glass
- Philip Glass helps Stephen show President Obama how to give a speech that is both repetitious and groundbreaking.
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- Add To My Lineup
- We Are at War - Philip Glass
-
- Game Change Gossip
- What really makes "Game Change" a page-turner is the authors don't bog it down with dead weight like sources or attribution.
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- Game Change Gossip
-
- Watercressgate
- Washington, DC is rocked with scandal as "Iron Chef America" lies about using vegetables from the White House garden.
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- Add To My Lineup
- Watercressgate
-
- Massachusetts Special Election
- The Massachusetts Senate race is the kind of national election Stephen loves -- the type that gets decided by one state.
- Play
- Add To My Lineup
- Massachusetts Special Election
-
- Own a Piece of Histor-Me - Original Interview Table
- Jack up the price of Stephen's original interview table since all proceeds will go to Haiti Disaster Relief.
- Play
- Add To My Lineup
- Own a Piece of Histor-Me - Original Interview Table
-
- Onward Christian Soldiers
- Technically Jesus rifles aren't a holy war -- they're more like an armor-piercing Sunday school.
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- Add To My Lineup
- Onward Christian Soldiers
-
- Boston Dream Guy
- Stephen owes Massachusetts an apology after voters elect Scott Brown to the Senate.
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- Add To My Lineup
- Boston Dream Guy
-
- Own a Piece of Histor-Me - Legendary Interview Table
- Own the legendary interview table where Stephen was baptized by Richard Branson and tongued by Jane Fonda.
- Play
- Add To My Lineup
- Own a Piece of Histor-Me - Legendary Interview Table
-
- Taliban Public Relations
- Now that the Taliban has stopped cutting off ears, lips and tongues, they're appealing to a broader demo.
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- Add To My Lineup
- Taliban Public Relations
-
- Obama Gets Called for Jury Duty
- Stephen's been called for jury duty a dozen times, and they never let him go when he tells them he's president.
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- Obama Gets Called for Jury Duty
-
- Andre Bauer Is Not Against Animals
- Andre Bauer is not against animals -- a dog is very handy for chasing poor people off his lawn.
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- Andre Bauer Is Not Against Animals
-
- Own a Piece of Histor-Me - Original C-Shaped Anchor Desk
- You can own Stephen's original C-shaped anchor desk made from the finest acrylic, wood and bones of his enemies.
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- Add To My Lineup
- Own a Piece of Histor-Me - Original C-Shaped Anchor Desk
-
- Hamid Karzai's Fashionable Hat
- Hamid Karzai is a constant target of assassination, but that doesn't stop him from making sure his head stands out from the crowd.
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- Hamid Karzai's Fashionable Hat
-
- Fox News Puts James O'Keefe Into Context
- Fox News will not jump to conclusions about James O'Keefe's arrest for tampering with Mary Landrieu's phone lines.
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- Fox News Puts James O'Keefe Into Context
-
- Stephen's State of the Union Speech
- White President Bob McDonnell connects with the average American after Barack Obama offers a floundering pre-buttal.
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- Stephen's State of the Union Speech
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